I have now been a mum for 2 years and 11 days. I know this is just about the most cliched thing a mum could say but I genuinely do not know where the time has gone. It doesn’t feel like very long since she was a tiny little screeching baby who didn’t really do anything except for cry and want milk. This time last year she wasn’t quite walking and still seemed like a little baby girl even though at the time we thought she was so grown up. Now I’ve got a walking talking cheeky funny creative noisy adorable little girl.
We all know that being a parent is seriously hard. There are always doubts, worries and stresses, always some weird new phase to try to understand, always someone looking over your shoulder with an opinion on what you are doing (I’ve said before it’s the judgement from others I find hardest about parenting). However, there are so many amazing moments that make parenting the best job in the world.
Of course there are the big things, the milestones in our children’s lives that we can celebrate. There are so many firsts to get excited about and remember. First smiles, giggles, steps, words, christmases, birthdays.
These big mile stone moments are lovely but I think it’s sometimes those small successes, the mundane things that can really turn a day around or make you smile or remind you that’s all worthwhile. I think I got more excited the day we managed to walk to Tesco and back in the buggy without any tears and completed a small shop without any drama than on Zara’s second birthday! I have an internal mini celebration every time I drop her off at her childminders and she happily kisses me goodbye and goes off to play with her friends. I relish every moment of drinking a coffee in a cafe when she’s sitting quietly (eating a snack) and I can relax and enjoy my coffee. I still feel a sense of achievement every time she goes to bed without any fuss and sleeps well.
There are so many subtle things that happen as you your watch a child grow up. I guess when you see someone every day you don’t even always notice things changing. Suddenly I’ll realise that she loves sitting and listening to a whole picture book, not just a simple board book. I’ll pay more attention to what she’s singing and notice that she’s actually got all the words to a particular nursery rhyme. She’ll tell me she can do something herself and she actually can.
I have to admit that I really like to be in control of any situation and I get quite anxious when things don’t go as planned. I’m slowly learning to let go a bit and realising that life with a toddler can be unpredictable and that’s ok. Not everything will be fun and sometimes I can’t do everything I want to do. Some days are ridiculously hard and I feel like I don’t have a clue what I’m doing. Sometimes I think I have the perfect morning planned out but for some reason Zara is in a funny mood and says no to everything or she lashes out at another child or refuses to get dressed. However, one of the greatest things about being around a toddler is that it can just take one tiny little thing to turn a whole day around. It might just be a kiss or cuddle that wasn’t asked for, it might be a little song she sings or something funny she does but she always manages to do something to brighten up my day and remind me how lucky I am.
Here is one more little success! Getting bunches in Zara’s hair without a fight!