20 ways you know you’re a parent

I know this is a fairly cliche blog post but it has been inspired by an event that happened in our house earlier. My daughter is 22 months old and we aren’t really trying to potty train her yet. However, in the last week or so she’s become very interested in her potty and really likes sitting on it. Today, totally randomly she marched up to me saying ‘nappy off, poo poo potty’. To be honest, I kind of ignored her at first and didn’t think much of it but she kept repeating it and was getting upset. I took her nappy off and she sat on her potty giggling. I really didn’t think anything would happen and went off into the kitchen to make lunch. A few minutes later she came in holding her hands up saying ‘oh’ and looking a bit worried. On closer inspection I realised she had poo on her hands. Low and behold she can done a poo in her potty. I think this entire paragraph is a massive ‘you know you’re a parent when’. Who knew I would be writing a paragraph about poo. I then phoned my husband and my daughter proudly told him on the phone she’d done a poo in her potty.

So. You know you’re a parent when…

  1. You phone your husband to talk about poo
  2. You know exactly where the creaky floorboards are in your house and can walk around without treading on them for fear of waking up super sensitive sleeping toddler.
  3. The washing machine is always on
  4. You find yourself wondering whether the missing (stupidly expensive) toddler shoe is in the washing machine (toddler loves putting random objects in the washing machine and shoe is missing).
  5. You stop referencing ‘Friends‘ in various real life situations and start referencing  ‘Peppa Pig‘ episodes.
  6. Your phone is frequently disabled because the toddler keeps trying to press the numbers and puts the code in wrong.
  7. You start baking odd combinations of food that you would probably never normally eat in a desperate bid to get the toddler to eat vegetables. Broccoli muffins anyone?
  8. You have spent a fortune on different kinds/colour/designs of toothbrush in the hope the toddler will love one of them and enjoy brushing her teeth. A flashing Peppa Pig one is sort of winning at the moment.
  9. All your bags seem to have some sort of random assortment of long lost toys in the bottom of them.
  10. Ditto my car.
  11. You have a bath with candles, a book, a rubber duck, a turtle and a fish.
  12. You spend ages looking for a pair of matching toddler socks only for them to remove them and throw them somewhere when you are not looking.
  13. The majority of your texts to other mum friends are about sleep or poo.
  14. You drive along pointing out buses and diggers even when the toddler isn’t in the car.
  15. You have a newfound respect and admiration for your own parents especially when you relay nightmare incidents to them and they say that you did that too.
  16. You walk round supermarkets really slowly when you are without toddler just because you can.
  17. Waking up at 8am is a mega lie in.
  18. You’ve taken part in 3 tea parties by lunch time involving a toddler, several toy monkeys and a lot of pretend tea.
  19. You can be found standing in the street waiting for your toddler to put their shoes back on, get up and walk.
  20. You know that one impromptu kiss or cuddle can make up for all the stress, tears or frustration. You never knew how much it was possible to love one little person.


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